Au Pair Guide

If you have an au pair, you should absolutely have guidelines set out in writing, even if they are only a few pages. Here are my initial thoughts about how to write and present an au pair guide. I will post more detailed information at a future date.

• Welcome—begin your au pair guide with a few words of welcome to your family and home
• Parenting Philosophy—let your au pair know a few overarching ideas you have about parenting (e.g., safety comes first, reward good behavior, choose words with care, set an example, etc.)
• Contacts—provide your au pair with her new home address and phone, your work and cell numbers and emergency contact information (including poison control and 911) and the name and number of your child’s pediatrician
• Responsibilities—write out your au pair’s specific responsibilities, even if you have discussed them orally
• House Rules—list any house rules (e.g., no smoking, rules about guests, etc.)
• School (Day Care) Instructions—let your au pair know any recurring information she will need about the children’s schools
• Weekday Routine—if you will have a general routine, put it in writing and note that it is subject to change
• Food—let your au pair know if there are food-related rules, customs or allergies
• Vacation—reiterate how much vacation time she will receive and if you have instructions about when she can take it (e.g., blackout periods and whether ask for approval a certain number of days or weeks beforehand)
• Stipend/Expenses—reiterate her stipend and spell out details about gas money, etc.; you should also choose a day each week to pay your au pair and stick to it
• Classes—give information about schools and classes that your au pair can take
• Curfew, Car and Driving—the more details about these topics, the better; separately give her a copy of your state’s rules of the road
• Safety/Emergencies—if you have a First Aid kit and instructions about emergencies, list them here
• Phones, Cell Phone—let her know what charges you and she will each cover, and how charges apply for incoming and outgoing calls; make sure to address text messaging and international calling
• Extended Family—if your au pair will meet members of your extended family, you may want to give her a “who’s who”
• Getting Around Town—it is helpful to give some basic information in writing about your town, such as how to find the grocery store, etc.
• How to Use Appliances, etc.—written instructions are helpful so if your au pair forgets how to use the dishwasher she doesn’t guess (wrong)

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Some thoughts about an au pair guide:

1)      It is helpful to have things in writing, so your au pair doesn’t need to keep everything in her head.

2)      Give your au pair at least a week to review the guide, and discuss the important points that you have put in writing. Don’t assume that you don’t need to mention things to your au pair orally if they are in the guide.

3)      You should go over each section of the guide with her. Be open in the discussions. Let her know this is her chance (but not her only chance) to ask questions. If she doesn’t understand the word “chance”, then say “opportunity”.

4)      Use clear words and sentences that are easy to understand.

5)      Give your au pair a copy of the guide to annotate/use and keep another copy in an easily accessible place (e.g., in a kitchen drawer).

6)         If you have a special needs child and/or there is specific medication or a schedule that needs to be administered or followed, this should be in writing.

See also: http://aupairwithflair.com/2010/05/23/au-pair-guidelines-car-rules/