OK, let’s cut to the bottom line. The first week with your au pair may suck. Especially if you are a new host parent. She doesn’t know how to do anything, from making lunches to driving to fill in the blank. She’s full of questions, and you aren’t even sure how to answer all of them, let alone find the patience for it. Your schedule is completely thrown off balance. Your kids are having a hard time adjusting. Your spouse is having a hard time adjusting. Life can only get better, right….?
Well, it doesn’t have to suck, and here’s why: it’s all about attitude. Not just hers. Yours.
Q: What are you doing this for?
A: The well-being of your family.
Remember that every time you help your au pair, you are also helping yourself. If you take a bit of time at the beginning to set things right, you will have the next 11+ months to reap the benefits. If you stress out about it, that stress gets passed on to your au pair and, ultimately, your entire family.
How do you stop yourself from stressing? Take a long-term view. The first week passes quickly. Almost as quickly, in fact, as the first few months of your child’s life. (Remember how much of that sucked too, even as some of the best moments of your life were being made?)
It is a good deed to treat your au pair with care and compassion. It is also – as simple as it may sound – good business. If you had a new employee at any other job, you wouldn’t expect him or her to know how to use the copy machine or log onto the computer system without being taught. Why expect that your au pair knows how to turn on your stove or dishwasher?
Invest some time, and you will thank yourself later. Or, as I said above, if you have the right attitude, the first won’t actually suck. It will simply be the first stage in an important process of giving your family and au pair an amazing year.
You are so right, Anne Marie. To do it this way, will indeed benefit everybody. Good luck with it and I hope it will be a fun process to go through.
Well put Ann. I was thinking about you recently and wondering how it is going with your new au pair. Seemed like the perfect match-
Hi, thanks Ellen. It’s been very fun to have our new au pair with us. The children are adjusting well, even though they miss our old au pair. There are a few hiccups, of course, but nothing major (knock wood!!)
Hi Michelle, yes, it is a great match. Our new au pair has hit the ground running, especially since two of us (me and my son) were sick in the first week. She is loving it already here and has even taken a trip by herself (on the train) to NYC.